Everything has postive and negative parts, it all depends on how you take it.
I had a dark side with me for a while, this dark side was a secret that I don't like to mention. For nearly an year, I thought I've learned how to hold my tears, but the truth is I put myself in a darker place, wait till one day my emotion explored. And it did explore for couple times.
Last year, I thought I could heal the sorrow in foreign country, but I was really afraid that it's gonna be too much to keep myself well and sound, so I came back home. And I am much better now. However, maybe it's because of this black month, June, I put myself back in again.
I also found it interesting that I pretty much enjoy being sad, it seems that it's the way I feel alive!